Rev. Melissa Culbreth, Asbury United Methodist, “Call to Community’’
Call to Community
------ Rev. Melissa Culbreth, Asbury United Methodist
It was 2010 and I had just returned from my deployment to Iraq where I served as a chaplain with the North Carolina Army National Guard as the 230th Brigade Support Battalion Chaplain for the 30th Heavy Brigade Combat Team. In Iraq, I was responsible for medical and mortuary emergencies. It was a challenging deployment and complicated by my being medically evacuated before my unit’s return due to a breast cancer diagnosis. Back at home, I faced re-acclimating to civilian life and processing my experiences in Iraq while undergoing breast cancer treatment.
I went to my mandatory Army mental health assessment conducted by a civilian psychologist. He looked at my file, then looked up at me and said, “Oh, you’re a chaplain. You have God, so you are fine, right?” In that moment it became readily apparent that the mental health world was not going to be helpful in navigating my new reality.
Returning to church after deployment presented its own difficulties, but I was hopeful that I would find support and community. Being a National Guardsmen, even after my military brothers and sisters returned home from deployment, many of us missed the camaraderie we depended on during our deployment. I was hoping church could fill this gap. While well meaning, however,the church I attended shied away from me and my mental health struggles. When I asked questions about faith and God, “fake it ‘til you make it” and “pray and read your Bible” were the only support I was offered.
These experiences led me to leave the church and not return for a long time. Sitting here 15 years later, I have found a faith community that is open to discussing mental health challenges and we are creating sacred spaces both within our congregation and out in the community where people can gather and find belonging… places where it is ok to show up when you are not ok.
In 2023, the Surgeon General published a study entitled “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation”. In 2014, when Dr. Vivek Murthy became the Surgeon General, he went on a cross-country listening tour. The stories of loneliness and disconnection that he heard were an epiphany moment for him that was later backed up by research. One in 2 adults in the United States report being affected by loneliness. Social disconnection has a greater impact on one’s mortality than obesity and physical inactivity and can decrease one’s life span just as much as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.1
The study proposes 6 pillars that can advance social connection and counteract the detrimental effects of isolation. Pillar #6, cultivating a culture of connection, urges organizations, like faith communities, to create and model values of connection like kindness, respect and service, as well as taking these types of connections out into our communities.2
Given increasing societal division, faith communities have an important opportunity to foster environments of connection and belonging. Michael Beck, in Never Alone, advocates for a “loving first” approach that begins where our faith begins… as God’s creations who are proclaimed good and loved unconditionally.3 By meeting people in accessible, familiar settings, our faith communities can be the answer to the widespread loneliness and isolation that Dr. Murthy observed. This is the kind of community I was searching for when I returned from Iraq.
Numerous resources exist to help us in this mission. The Sanctuary Course by Sanctuary Mental Health Ministries assists congregations in facilitating honest conversations about faith and mental health to become a “sanctuary” for those facing mental health challenges. Justin McRoberts and Scott Erickson’s new prayer book, In the Low, provides art and prayers specifically created to help people connect with God and community during times of depression. Additionally, Michael Beck has written prolifically on how churches can create inclusive gatherings outside of traditional church settings.
As we lament the issues and suffering we see in our world, may we also see that our faith communities are strategically placed “for such a time as this”.4
Reverend Melissa Culbreth serves as the Minister of Outreach at Asbury United Methodist Church in Durham. In addition to being a retired Army chaplain, she has served as a chaplain in both hospital and law enforcement settings. Melissa holds a Masters in Mental Health Counseling from North Carolina Central University and a Master of Divinity from Campbell University Divinity School. In her spare time, she enjoys hiking with her service dog, Lea.
1. Holt-Lunstad, Julianne and Susan Golant. Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community, Department of Health and Human Services, 2023, p. 4.
2. Ibid., p. 53
3. Beck, Michael Adam. Never Alone. Herald Press, 2024. p. 111.
4. Esther 4:14.
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